When I Slammed the Door on My Husband and What It Taught Me About Franchising
Last week on the way home from dinner, I asked my husband, who is fabulous in every way (I truly hit the jackpot), if we could swing by Walmart so I could grab three quick things we needed for the next day.
We pulled into the parking lot, and I naturally assumed he’d drop me at the front door. But instead, he parked.
Not just anywhere…he pulled into the farthest possible parking spot.
I sat there silent, thinking surely he was going to pull through and drop me off. But nope. He turned off the engine and sat there waiting for me to get out.
I was instantly frustrated. I slammed the truck door as I climbed out (which, by the way, is wildly ineffective in a heavy F250…he didn’t even notice). But as I walked the 30 seconds from the parking lot to the front entrance, I had a little moment of clarity…
I never said a word.
Not once did I say, “Hey babe, would you mind dropping me at the front?”
This exact same scenario had played out a few weeks earlier at Hobby Lobby. So now it was a pattern, except the pattern wasn’t him ignoring me, it was me expecting him to read my mind.
And here’s the truth I had to face on my brisk walk into Walmart:
Unspoken expectations are premeditated resentments.
I had created frustration. Not him. I never voiced my expectations. I assumed. I stewed. And then I acted like a teenager with a truck door. 🤦♀️
💡 And Then It Hit Me… This Is Exactly What Happens in Franchising
I’ve been coaching full-time for two years now, and one of the biggest recurring themes I see, especially with emerging franchisors, is this:
Franchisees and franchisors enter the relationship with assumptions, not alignment.
And just like my husband couldn’t possibly know what I wanted without me saying it, your franchisees can’t possibly understand what it takes to succeed if you don’t clearly tell them. On the flip side, you as the franchisor can’t read their minds either.
Where Expectations Often Go Sideways
Here are a few real-world examples of where I’ve seen expectations break down between franchisors and franchisees:
1. Marketing Support
Franchisee: “You’re going to run my local marketing, right?”
Franchisor: “We give you tools, but execution is up to you.”
Result: Frustration, poor results, blame-shifting.
2. Financial Performance
Franchisee: “I saw someone doing $1M in sales, I’ll be there in year one.”
Franchisor: “That location took three years, and they were a unicorn.”
Result: Disappointment, doubt, and feeling “sold a dream.”
Many franchisors avoid conversations about money for fear of crossing legal lines, but silence only breeds confusion. Setting realistic financial expectations for franchisees from the start is crucial. I love how Franchise Business Review dives into this in their article, “Profitability is Not a Mystery: Why Franchisors Must Start Talking About the Money”
3. Training & Onboarding
Franchisee: “After training, I’ll be ready to go.”
Franchisor: “Training is just the start, you’ll need to keep learning.”
Result: Overconfidence followed by overwhelm.
4. Communication Access
Franchisee: “I should be able to text you whenever.”
Franchisor: “We have a structured support system for a reason.”
Result: Misunderstood boundaries and burnout.
5. Franchisee Autonomy
Franchisee: “I’ll have flexibility to make changes in my market.”
Franchisor: “You agreed to brand consistency in the FDD.”
Result: Tension over innovation vs. compliance.
✅ How to Set (and Reset) Expectations That Stick
Here are some practical tips to help you create clarity and prevent silent frustrations:
1. Define Expectations Early and Often
Don’t wait until something breaks. Bake expectation-setting into your:
Discovery process
Franchisee onboarding
Training sessions
Ongoing calls
Say it before they sign. Then say it again.
2. Put It in Writing
Create documents like:
“What to Expect From Us” (Franchisor Responsibilities)
“What We Expect From You” (Franchisee Commitments)
Give examples of what great looks like and what it doesn’t.
3. Create a Success Profile
Define what a successful franchisee in your system does, believes, and prioritizes. Make it a visual. Let them self-assess.
4. Reinforce Through Your Support Cadence
Use your Community Calls, Newsletters, field visits, and check-ins to remind franchisees of:
The journey ahead
What’s normal to experience
What they are responsible for
Expectations drift unless they’re reinforced.
5. Teach Conflict Prevention
Coach your franchisees to ask:
“What should I expect from you?”
“What do you expect from me?”
If both parties ask that question regularly, resentment has no room to grow.
6. Do an “Expectation Audit”
Once or twice a year, ask your franchisees:
What did you expect that hasn’t happened?
What happened that you didn’t expect?
You’ll get gold from those answers and know exactly where to adjust.
Final Thought
Whether it's a parking lot or a franchise system, unmet expectations don’t have to lead to resentment if you’re willing to have the conversations that matter.
Franchising isn’t about perfection. It’s about partnership.
So say the thing. Set the expectation. Drop your franchisee at the door.
➡️ Want more insight into how expectations shift throughout the franchise journey? Check out my blog on The Six Stages of Franchising
If you’re an emerging franchisor and want to build a system based on clear communication, healthy relationships, and sustainable growth, I’d love to connect.
Let’s schedule a Clarity Call and talk about what you’re building.
Shine Lesson Learned:
Unspoken expectations create unnecessary tension, whether in a marriage or a franchise system. If we want strong, trust-filled relationships, we have to say the thing out loud. Clarity isn’t controlling, it’s kind. And the earlier we set expectations, the easier it is to grow something beautiful together.
Shine On, Shannon
